We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
