I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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