how can u be prego again
Do you still have your period?
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
