I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
i already hear my dad disowning me
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
