i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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