Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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