You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
