I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
