im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
He kissed a someone with a penis
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
