I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
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Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize