two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
