the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
