still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
