yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
