A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
