Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Randomize
