Can i not drive my cunt home
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize