I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
We need a shit load of segways right now
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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