i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
