There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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