Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
