living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
What a dumb baby whore.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
