So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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