Non-Jews are for practice
one might say we're banned from that church
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
