You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize