Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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