Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
