i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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