I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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