your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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