I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
