I can't watch pbs sober anymore
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
