don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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