we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize