Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize