Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
You don't make any sense
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