I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
