Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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