I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I AM VODKA MAN
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
