got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
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I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
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Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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