The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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