Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Dicks are not precious.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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