Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
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