69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
