his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Dear god my vagina.
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