You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize