I like my sex mixed with concussions.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
