yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
