to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Randomize
