420 ftw
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
